A man died and went to The Judgment. St. Peter met him at the Gates of
Heaven and said, “Before you meet with God, I thought I should tell you — we’ve
looked at your life, and your really didn’t do anything particularly good or
bad.

We’re not at all sure what to do with you. Can you tell us anything you
did that can help us make a decision?”

The newly arrived soul thought for a moment and replied, “Yeah, once I was
driving along and came upon a woman who was being harassed by a group of
bikers. So I pulled over, got out my tire iron, and went up to the leader of
the bikers. He was a big, muscular, hairy guy with tattoos all over his body
and a ring pierced through his nose. Well, I tore the nose ring out of his
nose, and told him he and his gang had better stop bothering the woman or
they would have to deal with me!”

“I’m impressed,” St. Peter responded, “When did this happen?”
“About two minutes ago,” replies the guy.