Lawyer: “Judge, I wish to appeal my client’s case on the basis of newlydiscovered evidence.” Judge: “And what is the nature of the new evidence?” Lawyer: “Judge, I discovered that my client still has $500 left.”  

Aug. 15, 2006 – In a move aimed at further tightening airport security, theFederal Aviation Administration announced today that it would ban all peoplefrom flights leaving or entering the United States, effective immediately. The FAA, which has in the past banned such objects as toenail clippers andhair gel, took the extraordinary step of banning people […]

Here is an exercise suggested for seniors, to build muscle strength in the arms and shoulders. It seems so easy, so I thought I’d pass it on to some of my friends. Just don’t over-do it. Begin by standing on a comfortable surface, where you have plenty of room at each side. With a 5-LB. […]

The Pope went in for his daily prayer. That morning he felt especiallysincere as he prayed “Our Father which art in heaven” from the core of hisheart. An unusually long time passed. When eventually he came out of his prayingchamber, he was thoughtfully chewing something and not looking at anyone. After a long silence one […]

An American decided to write a book about famous churches around the world. So he bought a plane ticket and took a trip to china. On his first day he was inside a church taking photographs when he noticed a golden telephone mounted on the wall with a sign that read “$10,000 per call”. The […]

A powerful senator dies after a prolonged illness. His soul arrives in heaven and is met by St. Peter at the entrance. “Welcome to Heaven,” says St. Peter. “Before you settle in, it seems there is a problem. We seldom see a high official around these parts, you see, so we’re not sure what to […]

First, we survived being born to mothers who smoked and/or drank while they carried us. They took aspirin, ate blue cheese dressing, tuna from a tin, and didn’t get tested for diabetes.  Then after that trauma, our baby cots were covered with bright colored lead-based paints.  We had no childproof lids on medicine bottles, doors […]

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~A little boy was overheard praying: “Lord, if you can’t make me a better boy, don’t worry about it. I’m having a real good time like I am.”    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~After the christening of his baby brother in church, Jason sobbed all the way home in the back seat of the car. His father asked him three times what was wrong.   Finally, […]

An Indian man walks into a bank in New York City and asks for the loanofficer. He tells the loan officer that he is going to India on businessfor two weeks and needs to borrow $5,000. The bank officer tells him that the bank will need some form of securityfor the loan, so the Indian […]

A woman arrived at the Gates of Heaven. While she was waiting for Saint Peter to greet her, she peeked through the gates.  She saw a beautiful banquet table. Sitting all around were her parents and all the other people she had loved and who had died before her. They saw her and began calling […]